The Amish are Right. Again.

Muddy Kids, a photo by paynehollow on Flickr.

Subtitle: And So Are Dudes.

Sub-Subtitle: A Scientific Validification of the Five Second Rule

So, I heard this news story from NPR...

Allergies are on the rise these days, especially in children. Nearly half of all kids are now allergic to something, be it food, animals, or plants. Federal health officials say that rate is two to five times higher than it was 30 years ago.

And as researchers are trying to understand why, they're increasingly looking at kids who grow up on farms.

The leading theory behind the uptick in childhood allergies, says Andy Nish, a physician with a private practice in Gainesville, Ga., is the hygiene hypothesis. Paradoxically, the theory goes, we're too clean.

"It looks like with our modern conditions and cleanliness that we have fewer and fewer germs to fight off," Nish says. Our immune systems protect us by learning to fight off foreign invaders, whether they're harmless or not. We can't train our defenses if we don't get exposed."

...Holbreich recently did a study, published in the Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology, which found very low rates of allergies among Amish children living on farms in Indiana. He says the reason may be because the children get exposed very early on to dirty environments, and to a variety of dust and germs. Even young kids are often in the barn, working with animals, and drinking raw milk.

"We think there's something about milk," Holbreich says. "That's key, along with exposure to large animals, particularly cows."

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Not exposed enough to germs and dirt? We're TOO clean? Well, then, just take a lesson from the Amish and dudes everywhere: Get out in the dust and mud and muck! Eat after your dog! Drop that chewing gum on the bathroom floor and pick it up within five seconds and pop it back in your mouth - you're good! (In fact, maybe we need to extend the "five second rule" to the "sixty second rule..."!)

While the Amish lifestyle is proven right all the time, it's not often that dudes get vindicated. So, haha! We DO know something. Eat that!

Who would have guessed it?

I'd like to close this moment of triumph with a poem appropriate for the moment...

An Ode to the Gross and Uncouth

There once was scientific proof
That showed that guys knew the truth
That living in slime
filth, grunge and grime
Is, in point of fact, quite couth.

So the next time you drop your chicken
Pick it up! It's still finger-lickin'
Good to the taste
So please don't waste
Lickin' a stricken chicken won't sicken!